A couple of weeks ago, I shared how to balance work and life, and we received so many emails from you expressing thanks. Hey, thanks for the thanks! 🤗
Today, I thought I would share how to balance marriage and life.
Marc and I have been married for 18 years--can you believe it?!
If I told you the ride has been easy, I'd be lying to you.
No, in fact, the first six years after our daughter was born was rough. There were times when I didn't know if we would last.
And if it didn't last, that would have eventually been okay. After all, the majority of my friends are divorced and living happier lives.
But I knew we weren't done yet. We needed to do one more thing together.
We both created Savor Life lists.
On his list, he wrote, "Climb mountains, live in the country, be in charge of the manufacturing facility."
On my list, I wrote, "Live near Central Park, weekly dinner dates, have a country home."
Fast forward nearly four years, we live two blocks from Central Park, have a weekend farmhouse, and Marc runs our manufacturing facility alongside his day job.
Sounds like magic, right?
No, marriage is work and commitment. We worked at this. Correction: we work at it every day.
And the work starts with you.
Here's my top 3 words of wisdom:
1. Create your Savor Life list. When you make yourself happy, you are so much more fun to be around!
Haven't started yet? Grab your planner, turn to the "Savor Life List" on page 3, and start jotting down how you want to enjoy life.
The happier each person is, the happier the relationship is.
2. Take ownership of your 50%. A relationship is always 50/50.
As soon as you take responsibility for more than your 50%, you get on a road that leads to nowhere.
You are not responsible for your partner's triggers, unhappiness, and reactions.
You are only responsible for how you show up.
And yes, you are 100% responsible for your 50%.
3. Do "little nices." Last weekend, I was sick as a dog. (Sorry, that's why you didn't get an email from me last week!)
After I got well, I gave tribute to my man for cooking homemade chicken soup, getting me fresh vitamin C juice, filling my car with gas, and even having dinner with sick ol' me in bed!
You can't change anyone but yourself. And that's the golden relationship rule I've learned in all my years in marriage.
Angela Jia Kim